A letter to Ella Jade

Dear Ella Jade,

Let's get one thing clear first. I'm your Auntie Tiffany and I am the responsible one in the family. In fact, God screwed up and I was supposed to be born before your daddy. I always questioned his fatherhood skills starting with his pet snake. Oh no, I don't mean that one that got you where you are today. I mean the one he "rescued" and stuck in a plastic gallon ice cream tub. The problem was that he cut the air holes bigger than the snakes body. Well, panic erupted in the Chilton household and the search was on for your daddy's missing snake. And where did it end up? Napping on my register in the floor next to my bed. See even the snake knew I was the one who can handle the situation.

There were several small mammals later until he got a dog. You see, he was in college when Chloe was adopted and boy did she know how to party with the guys. Who let her drink Jack Daniel's Tennessee Tea in her doggy bowl? Well, I can't say for sure it was your daddy but I can tell you he was there but he might have been too busy hanging upside down drinking from a keg at the time.


And don't even get me started about when your daddy goes out with his friends and "forgets his wallet." Wink. Wink. Your daddy will travel hundreds of miles from home on a trip to see friends and family and have nothing but a $5 dollar bill with him. So how do you think he is capable of taking care of a 7lb. 4oz. human being full of poop and spit up?


I have to say, even though your daddy seems to not have it all together sometimes like his finances, or his pet snake; I have a feeling that you are going to be just fine. Daddy will just know how to take care of you and from what I can tell you are going to have the best dad in the world. Just remember to stash some extra cash in your pink Hanna Montana wallet for times when daddy forgets money to get you ice cream.

And I can't leave out your mommy. I haven't known her as long as I have known your daddy but I know she is a good balance in the world of responsibility. Between the two of them you got good looks, lots of gorgeous hair and if you are super, duper lucky like daddy is hoping... you'll surpass the 5'6" mark in height. That's because your mommy's side of the family is tall. Daddy is crossing his fingers and filling out the necessary paperwork to get you a basketball scholarship.

Your mommy and daddy are going to love you with all their hearts and take the best care of you. And the best part, you have aunties and uncles plus a load of grandparents who will buy the moon for you every holiday, birthday or special event.

Good luck kid. Can't wait to meet you in person.

Love,

Auntie Tiffany